The divorce has been hard on you, and you can only imagine the difficulties your children are having. They may not be able to put into words their emotions and confusion over the drastic changes taking place, and you know there may be many years of confusion ahead if you and your soon-to-be former spouse don't find a fair way to resolve the custody question.
Children don't often get much say in the aftermath of a divorce. Parents make decisions, and courts make rulings, all seemingly with the best interests of the child in mind. Until recent generations, courts assumed that it was dangerous to separate a child from its mother - especially overnight - until the child was old enough to attend school. For this reason, both fathers and children may have missed important opportunities to bond.